Do you want to know what held me back for years from experimenting with my hair and makeup? I think it was fear. I think that I was afraid of looking like I was trying too hard, or looking like I cared too much, or looking... well... stupid. It was as if I felt that to deviate from the normal was to call major attention to myself, and I didn't want the attention.
I'm not sure if I ever would have started experimenting if I hadn't gotten a job in a hair salon. I'm the kind of person who learns by watching: I watch every movement in detail and then recreate it. So after months of watching people do hair all day, both on other people and themselves, I started to play around and try to style my hair. Sure, it was a little nerve-wracking at first! I was afraid that the people around me would think, "Aw, cute, she's trying to style her hair." The way I saw it was that it had to be perfect, or else I would look stupid for trying.
Anybody feel me? I'm not sure where I picked up this idea that it looks stupid if it's not perfect. Most of my life I haven't thought of myself as a perfectionist, but that's when I started to realize that I totally am. And I wasn't giving myself the room to learn and practice and get better. So, until I allowed myself to imperfect in the process of learning, I was destined to look the same forever.
What I love about the art of hair & makeup is how much you can do with it. You can enhance someone's look, or you can totally change it in a million different ways. Before I worked at La Bella, I used to shampoo & condition my hair, maybe spray something volumizing in it, dry it upside down, and call it a day. Stick-straight, flat hair. Because I just didn't know that there were so many more options! And once I started experimenting, I found there were so many things I could do with my hair if I just tried them. And that the more I did them, the better I got.
The same goes with makeup. I think there's a fear of not being able to "pull something off." A lot of people don't fill in their brows, or wear lipstick, or try a smokey eye, because they think they can't pull it off. I don't know what you think you need to pull something off, but you can pull it off. What makes you believable is the confidence with which you wear the look!
But there it is: the confidence. That's the hardest part, isn't it? Having the confidence to wear the look. Here is where it just takes a little bit of guts. Just a little bit of stepping out and doing it. Here are the two things I want you to remember:
1. No matter how bad you think you are at doing something, you will get better. You just have to keep doing it. The more you put on eyeliner, the better you'll get at putting on eyeliner. The more you curl your hair, the better (and faster) you'll get at curling your hair.
2. You might try a common technique, like filling in your brows or wearing bright lipstick, and think you look horrendous... but you probably look totally normal (and even good!). Your gut reaction is most likely based on the fact that you just look different. Give it 15 minutes, and I almost guarantee you will get used to it. And you'll get compliments!
So... I challenge you to try something new this week! Try gel liner, or filling in your brows, or contouring your face, or false lashes, or bright lipstick, or anything that you've been afraid to try. And don't forget to tell me about it! I know you'll be great :)
p.s. just for you... what I used to look like every day of my life vs. what's possible now that I try new things!
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